My father was abusive when I was growing up. When he died, I wasn’t going to attend his funeral but my husband, Earl, insisted I go. Before the service, I walked back and forth from a pew to Dad's open casket crying violently.
“Why didn't I ever tell him how much he hurt me!”
After his funeral, I felt purged of anger and hatred toward him.
I was wrong.
Thirteen years later Earl and I attended a marriage seminar called Steps to Setting Your Marriage Free in Christ (Neil T. Anderson). Going in, we each believed we had a good marital relationship. As we worked through the many issues raised, and as we prayed and asked God to show us the truth, we found ourselves discovering things about each other as well as identifying things within ourselves.
God revealed to me a lifetime of rage, anger, hurt and unforgiveness toward my earthly father. Until then I hadn’t realized how much Dad had harmed my emotions and my spirit. The tears came again, though not violently this time. They were cleansing, relieving, and Earl cried with me. We cried for how all my anger and hatred had tarnished our marriage for thirteen years. When I forgave Daddy that day I felt a peace I had never known before.
Often we don’t recognize the unforgiveness within us. We justify our attitudes. A part of making sure our life is clean and right before God has to do with forgiving other people.
Everything we do in life has eternal value that hinges on two things: loving God and loving others. It’s hard to forgive those who have hurt, offended, or mistreated us, but God wants us to love even our enemies and in the process of doing so He perfects us.
God wants you to move into all He has for you. But, if you don't forgive you're stuck where you are and shutting off God's work in your life. Forgiveness opens your heart and mind and allows the Holy Spirit to work freely in you. It releases you to love God more and feel His love in greater measure.
If you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive them their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses (Matthew 6:14-15).
Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: Love your neighbor as yourself. All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments (Matthew 22:37-40).
In Christ Alone,
Berta
Tuesday, October 4, 2011
Thursday, September 15, 2011
No Condemnation
Arriving at my favorite bar one afternoon, I noticed the tiny place of business next door had poster-board signs in the window. “PRAYER ROOM for JESUS.” I laughed as I entered the bar, “Did you see the sign next door?” At first, we all thought it was a joke because the woman who owned the bar owned that space as well.
When the young men started coming into the bar we were shocked and the banter began. “Look at these freaks. They must be crazy thinking we’d buy their snake oil.”
One of the men got too close to John. Throwing an arm over the young man's shoulders, John said, “Hey let me buy you a beer?”
“Sir, I don’t need alcohol. I have something better.”
John gave him a push, “Just get out of here man. We don’t want any of that Bible stuff.”
We were cruel. Whoever saw one of them come in hollered, “Jesus!” And every other drunk responded, “Freak!” We continued the cadence as loud and proud as we could until we were bored with them and turned our attention back to our beer consumption, bar talk, and pool games.
Those young men stuck it out, unashamedly approaching each person as they strived to share Jesus with every one of us. Not just once but every day, several times a day, at all hours of the day and night.
I was swept up with the crowd, as were the Jews of the day who yelled, “Crucify Him!”
God never gave up on me. Just the opposite, He sent angels in the form of men and women to show me how great His love was for me.
I praise Him and thank him for saving me and for seeing me through Christ’s Blood. And having put away my past,* I’m living each day as a “Jesus Freak,” boldly testifying to His great love, mercy, grace, and forgiveness.
How could I do less?
There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. For the law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus has set you free from the law of sin and of death. For God has done what the law, weakened by the flesh, could not do: by sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh, and to deal with sin, he condemned sin in the flesh, so that the just requirement of the law might be fulfilled in us, who walk not according to the flesh but according to the Spirit (Romans 8:1-4 NRSV).
*Ephesians 4:21-25
In Christ Alone,
Berta
When the young men started coming into the bar we were shocked and the banter began. “Look at these freaks. They must be crazy thinking we’d buy their snake oil.”
One of the men got too close to John. Throwing an arm over the young man's shoulders, John said, “Hey let me buy you a beer?”
“Sir, I don’t need alcohol. I have something better.”
John gave him a push, “Just get out of here man. We don’t want any of that Bible stuff.”
We were cruel. Whoever saw one of them come in hollered, “Jesus!” And every other drunk responded, “Freak!” We continued the cadence as loud and proud as we could until we were bored with them and turned our attention back to our beer consumption, bar talk, and pool games.
Those young men stuck it out, unashamedly approaching each person as they strived to share Jesus with every one of us. Not just once but every day, several times a day, at all hours of the day and night.
I was swept up with the crowd, as were the Jews of the day who yelled, “Crucify Him!”
God never gave up on me. Just the opposite, He sent angels in the form of men and women to show me how great His love was for me.
I praise Him and thank him for saving me and for seeing me through Christ’s Blood. And having put away my past,* I’m living each day as a “Jesus Freak,” boldly testifying to His great love, mercy, grace, and forgiveness.
How could I do less?
There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. For the law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus has set you free from the law of sin and of death. For God has done what the law, weakened by the flesh, could not do: by sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh, and to deal with sin, he condemned sin in the flesh, so that the just requirement of the law might be fulfilled in us, who walk not according to the flesh but according to the Spirit (Romans 8:1-4 NRSV).
*Ephesians 4:21-25
In Christ Alone,
Berta
Tuesday, August 30, 2011
To What Are You Called?
Reading about Jabez in Charles Swindoll’s study guide, Old Testament Characters, really got my attention. He titled this chapter, Jabez: Disabled But Not Disqualified. My first thought: “Was Jabez disabled?” Of course, I was looking at the physical. He wasn’t born blind or deaf. He could walk, run, even leap. He didn’t have a withered hand and yes, he was in his right mind. Where was his disability?
The author began with the physical as well. He compared Olympic athletes. Each prepared for their specific area of ability. Swimming. Running. Gymnastics. Not one disability.
So, what was Jabez’ disability? I read those two verses that tell us all we know about Jabez:
“Now Jabez was more honorable than his brothers, and his mother called his name Jabez, saying, ‘Because I bore him in pain.’ And Jabez called on the God of Israel saying, ‘Oh, that You would bless me indeed, and enlarge my territory, that Your hand would be with me, and that You would keep me from evil, that I may not cause pain!’ So God granted him what he requested.” (1 Chronicles 4:9-10 NKJV).
I still didn’t get it. I saw that his mother “bore him in pain.” I thought about it. Maybe his gestation was arduous or his delivery painful. Maybe he was another mouth to feed in a poor, already full house. So, was he small? Hungry? Mistreated? Turn the page:
His name, Jabez, meant “pain.” Whatever caused his mother to name him “Pain,” he lived every day with a reminder that he was a distress. He asked God to keep him from evil so he wouldn’t cause pain.
Next, Jabez’ reputation: verse 9 begins: “Now Jabez was more honorable than his brothers ....” More honorable. He rose above the name that seemed should tear him down and God was able to use him in his specific calling.
Dr. Swindoll then quoted Charles Spurgeon:
‘“It will sometimes happen that where there is the most sorrow in the antecedents, there will be the most pleasure in the sequel. As the furious storm gives place to the clear sunshine, so the night of weeping precedes the morning of joy. Sorrow the harbinger; gladness the prince it ushers in .... More honourable than his brethren was the child whom his mother bore with sorrow .... The honour [Jabez] enjoyed would not have been worth having if it had not been vigorously contested and equitably won.’”
That’s where the author got me! My entire study time focused on “Where is his disability?” My self-righteous indignation as a person with a disability had clouded my perspective! I had quietly known it was there. I would think things like, “I shouldn’t always look for disabilities when a car parks in a disabled space, but ....”
My faith rose through the cloud as I faced my prejudice: I’m not special because I’m disabled. I’m special because I’m a child of the living God. Forgiven and set free. And God has been able to use me in His specific calling on my life.
“‘The honour [Jabez] enjoyed would not have been worth having if it had not been vigorously contested and equitably won.’”
He called me to be a person who would boldly proclaim what He does for me.
In Christ Alone,
Berta
Charles R. Swindoll, Old Testament Characters Bible Study Guide (1986 pgs. 51-52)
Charles H. Sturgeon, The Treasury of the Bible (Grand Rapids, MI,: Zondervan Publishing House, 1968), vol. 2, p. 1.
The author began with the physical as well. He compared Olympic athletes. Each prepared for their specific area of ability. Swimming. Running. Gymnastics. Not one disability.
So, what was Jabez’ disability? I read those two verses that tell us all we know about Jabez:
“Now Jabez was more honorable than his brothers, and his mother called his name Jabez, saying, ‘Because I bore him in pain.’ And Jabez called on the God of Israel saying, ‘Oh, that You would bless me indeed, and enlarge my territory, that Your hand would be with me, and that You would keep me from evil, that I may not cause pain!’ So God granted him what he requested.” (1 Chronicles 4:9-10 NKJV).
I still didn’t get it. I saw that his mother “bore him in pain.” I thought about it. Maybe his gestation was arduous or his delivery painful. Maybe he was another mouth to feed in a poor, already full house. So, was he small? Hungry? Mistreated? Turn the page:
His name, Jabez, meant “pain.” Whatever caused his mother to name him “Pain,” he lived every day with a reminder that he was a distress. He asked God to keep him from evil so he wouldn’t cause pain.
Next, Jabez’ reputation: verse 9 begins: “Now Jabez was more honorable than his brothers ....” More honorable. He rose above the name that seemed should tear him down and God was able to use him in his specific calling.
Dr. Swindoll then quoted Charles Spurgeon:
‘“It will sometimes happen that where there is the most sorrow in the antecedents, there will be the most pleasure in the sequel. As the furious storm gives place to the clear sunshine, so the night of weeping precedes the morning of joy. Sorrow the harbinger; gladness the prince it ushers in .... More honourable than his brethren was the child whom his mother bore with sorrow .... The honour [Jabez] enjoyed would not have been worth having if it had not been vigorously contested and equitably won.’”
That’s where the author got me! My entire study time focused on “Where is his disability?” My self-righteous indignation as a person with a disability had clouded my perspective! I had quietly known it was there. I would think things like, “I shouldn’t always look for disabilities when a car parks in a disabled space, but ....”
My faith rose through the cloud as I faced my prejudice: I’m not special because I’m disabled. I’m special because I’m a child of the living God. Forgiven and set free. And God has been able to use me in His specific calling on my life.
“‘The honour [Jabez] enjoyed would not have been worth having if it had not been vigorously contested and equitably won.’”
He called me to be a person who would boldly proclaim what He does for me.
In Christ Alone,
Berta
Charles R. Swindoll, Old Testament Characters Bible Study Guide (1986 pgs. 51-52)
Charles H. Sturgeon, The Treasury of the Bible (Grand Rapids, MI,: Zondervan Publishing House, 1968), vol. 2, p. 1.
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